Sunday, 22 June 2014

Not a Crossdresser

On reflection, I suppose that I should explain a little more about what I'm trying to achieve.

There is absolutely no way that I will ever pass. However convincingly I dress, do my hair and make-up, however good my walk, my mannerisms and voice modulation is, my height screams biological male. I've never met a woman as tall as me. Yes, a few inches shorter but very rarely. A tall woman is an unusual enough sight that she will attract attention simply for being tall and part of that attention is the unconscious question of whether she might be a man especially if she is even slightly androgynous in appearance. Heels make it worse. I've a couple of tall women friends and they tend to shy away from heels.

Getting upset about not passing would be foolish and it's not as if I really want to pass. I'm much more interested in the dissonance that the juxtaposition of traditionally male and female elements creates. I may not be as confrontational as some who use the term genderfuck but I do have considerable sympathy with them. I also have considerable sympathy with those who use the term genderfluid - strangely, I can't find a compelling definition of it on the internet but, in essence, they slide up and down the gender spectrum.

The idea of a spectrum, that the binary is a social construct, is part of what my "dressing" is about. But what my blog is about is about is what looks more feminine on me. Whilst I sometimes dress very simply, with no attempt at changing my shape, there aren't any learning points to share.

I reject "crossdresser" as a label in binary terms. My cursory venture into trying to grasp what others think is that there is a very binary thing with many "crossdressers" - the reluctant dressing as a man in the majority of their lives and the wanting to "pass" when they dress as a woman even if they are not out of the closet. I neither approve or disapprove. It's more - I don't think that way.

No comments:

Post a Comment